♥ Diana’s Blog

Two ‘o clock and I wish that I was sleeping
You’re in my head like a song on the radio
All I know is that I got to get next to you
Yeah I got to get next to you
Sitting here turning minutes into hours
To find the nerve just to call you on the telephone
You don’t know that I got to get next to you

[Chorus]
Maybe were friends
Maybe were more
Maybe it’s just my imagination
But I see you stare just a little too long
And it makes me start to wonder
So baby call me crazy
But I think you feel it too
Maybe I, Maybe I
Just got to get next to you

I asked around and I heard that you were talking
Told my girl that you thought I was out of your league
What a fool, I got to get next to you, whoa
Yeah it’s five in the morning and I can’t go to sleep
‘Cause I wish, yeah I wish that you knew what you mean to me
Baby let’s get together and end this mystery, oh

[Chorus]
Maybe were friends
Maybe were more
Maybe it’s just my imagination
But I see you stare just a little too long
And it makes me start to wonder
So baby call me crazy
But I think you feel it too
Maybe I, Maybe I
Just got to get next to you

Whatcha got to say? Whatcha got to do?
How ya get the one you want to want to get next to you?

Whatcha got to say? Whatcha got to do?
How ya get the one you want to want to get next to you?

Whatcha got to say? Whatcha got to do?
How ya get the one you want to want to get next to you?

Whatcha got to say? Whatcha got to do?
How ya get the one you want to want to get next to you?
Yeah, yeah, to want to get next to you

[Chorus]
Maybe were friends
Maybe were more
Maybe it’s just my imagination
But I see you stare just a little too long
And it makes me start to wonder
So baby call me crazy
But I think you feel it too
Baby call me crazy
But I know you feel it too
Maybe I, Maybe I
Just got to get next to you
Yeah, yeah, yeah
I got to get next to you

This sweet song keep lingering in my head lately but I don’t know the title, so I searched it and found the match one — this is the lyrics:

It’s kinda suit my situation.

ucapkanlah kasih satu kata yg ku nantikan
sebab ku tak mampu membaca matamu
mendengar bisikmu

nyanyikanlah kasih senandung kata hatimu
sebab ku tak sanggup mengartikan getar ini
sebab ku meragu pada dirimu

reff:
mengapa berat ungkapkan cinta
padahal ia ada
dalam rinai hujan
dalam terang bulan
juga dalam sedu sedan

mengapa sulit mengaku cinta
padahal ia terasa
dalam rindu dendam
hening malam
cinta terasa ada

nyanyikanlah kasih senandung kata hatimu
sebab ku tak sanggup mengartikan getar ini
sebab ku meragu pada dirimu

reff:
mengapa berat ungkapkan cinta
padahal ia ada
dalam rinai hujan
dalam terang bulan
juga dalam sedu sedan

mengapa sulit mengaku cinta
padahal ia terasa
dalam rindu dendam
hening malam
cinta terasa ada

When I need to cuddle up
Where are you, V?
When I need you by my side
Can I count on you, V?

When I call you upon my sadness
Why you never pick up?
When I need you to ease my loneliness
How can you never show up?

So I guess
it is very odd
to want a stranger
who I can’t even hold

Honesty is not always people show me even if he/she is very close, e.g.; closest friends, relatives, and even parents. Mostly people who expect a kind of a good relationship with me, they are leaning being like an imposter.

I understand that everyone wants to show good impression, make me impress or at least just to hide the things that you think it is “bad”. But, I’m very disappointed with that kind of attitude and it makes me (may be) can’t trust that person again forever (even though I admit that sometimes I do it, too). But here’s what I think: “this is me, good and bad sides… if he/she really a good friend and having a good faith in me, really care for me — then he/she can accept me for the way I am (good and bad)” — and that’s the kind of person who I seek (I seek for friends only!!).

So, I’m hoping that every one of you (especially who want to make a good relationship with me) just be honest and be yourself.

A few weeks ago, my dear friend gave me a link to “F4 - Make A Wish” video at youtube. My asume is that may be he thinks I like that song. But actually, Asian songs never really goes in to my heart so deeply. If I like it, it just because I had some kind of good memories attach to it. And everytime I remember that song, I remember those memories.

At the time I watched into the video, what I’m looking is not only that video clip, but a kind of video played in my head; it was when he sang it at NAV and for a while I did make a wish — those feelings came back to me too like the moment is going just about yesterday.

So do “Brown Eyes - Already One Year”. I’m sorry that I lied when I say about why I like that song. It’s not about the song, but it’s about the memories when I (obviously for the first time notice that… ) I listen to it, it reminds me to certain of memories and the way I’m feeling at that time.

Regret is a kind of feeling I think I never feel it deeply and never appear too often. Mostly because, well… I think it’s just a waste of time to feel it, I just use it like a pedal to move toward to be better; better attitude, better person.

There’s this one special guy asked me if I regret of what my personal life’s going lately, it’s been a month since I met him and sometime I remember about that question which has an answer, it is; “NO, I don’t regret it at all”.

I was felt comfortable with my life before, it WAS… and then I think about how will I live my life in the future, will I keep this man for forever in my life? So many doubts linger, but I still cannot decide to change it coz I have no courage to change it — until I met this special guy “DRAGGED” me out one day.

My life’s totally change and it’s the BIGGEST part in my life, it’s NOT simple at all and it’s not a comfortable process — I’m not enjoying it. BUT… regret is not my thing and it does not emerge.

In so many times I want to mad at this special guy changing my life into unusual ways, about how that’s “not enjoyment” process I felt, but thinking about what I really want to achieve, and every single thing in my life is actually going better, I should be thankful to that special guy who was dragged me out.

So, if you read this; that’s my answer.

Who are you? (I don’t know)
What you’re thinking? (I don’t know)
What I am to you? (I don’t know)
What you want from me? (I’m not sure)

The one I’m sure about
It is I know you
I think I know you
You’re not a stranger

You’re someone from above
You are my missing pieces
The one who I’m not questioning
At the moment I see your eyes

Let me hurt
So you can ease my pain
Let me cry
So you can wipe away my tears

Let me fall for you
And you’ll be catching me up
Let me die inside
So you can rise me up

So just let me hurt for you
And you can heal me with your warm sweet love
Coz I love you V, and I always will

Breathe you out, breathe you in
You keep coming back to tell me
You’re the one who could’ve been

And my eyes see it all so clear
It was long ago and far away
But it never disappears

Try to put it in the past
Hold on to myself and don’t look back

I don’t wanna dream about all the things that never were
Maybe I can live without, when I’m out from under
I don’t wanna feel the pain, what good would it do me now?
I’ll get it all figured out, when I’m out from under
(From under, from under, from under)

So let me go, just let me fly away
Let me feel the space between us growin’ deeper
And much darker every day

Watch me now and I’ll be someone new
My heart will be unbroken
It will open up for everyone but you

Even when I cross the line
It’s like a lie I’ve told a thousand times

I don’t wanna dream about all the things that never were
Maybe I can live without, when I’m out from under
I don’t wanna feel the pain, what good would it do me now?
I’ll get it all figured out, when I’m out from under
(From under, from under, from under, from under)

A part of me still believes when you say you’re gonna stick around
A part of me still believes we can find a way to work it out
But I know that we tried everything we could try
So let’s just say goodbye forever

I don’t wanna dream about all the things that never were
And maybe I can live without, when I’m out from under
And I don’t wanna feel the pain, what good would it do me now?
I’ll get it all figured out when I’m out from under

I don’t wanna dream about all the things that never were
And maybe I can live without, when I’m out from under
And I don’t wanna feel the pain, what good would it do me now?
I’ll get it all figured out, when I’m out from under
(From under, from under, from under, from under)

Weak
I had been crying and crying for weeks
How’d I survive when I could barely speak?
Barely eat, on my knees

But that’s the moment you came to me
I don’t know what your love has done to me
Think I’m invincible
I see through the me I used to be

You changed my whole life
Don’t know what you’re doing
To me with your love

I’m feeling all superhuman you did this to me
A superhuman heart beats in me
Nothing can stop me here with you

Superhuman
I feel so superhuman
Superhuman
I feel so superhuman
Superhuman

Strong
Since I been flying and righting the wrongs
Feels almost like I had it all along
I can see tomorrow

Where every problem is gone because
I flew everywhere with love inside of me
It’s unbelievable to see
How love can set me free

You changed my whole life
Don’t know what you’re doing
To me with your love

I’m feeling all superhuman you did this to me
A superhuman heart beats in me
Nothing can stop me here with you

Superhuman
I feel so superhuman
Superhuman
I feel so superhuman

It’s not a bird, not a plane
It’s my heart and it’s going gone away
My only weakness is you, only reason is you
Every minute with you I feel like I can do anything
Going, going I’m gone away! Love!

You changed my whole life
Don’t know what you’re doing
To me with your love

I’m feeling all superhuman you did this to me
A superhuman heart beats in me
Nothing can stop me here with you

Superhuman
Superhuman